The Amplifier Effect

I read in my heading of my Nosensical Muzingz, that this is another Neverland. As of late, it seems that I have a habit of leaning toward the negative. I don't mean to, but I have a tendency to perhaps indulge in angst, drama and the dark. Truth be told and to the horror of some, I'd say I'm a goth at heart if not in wardrobe. But shhh! you didn't read it in my blog.

Anyway, on to the amplifier effect. I don't really know what brings it on except for prolonged periods of stillness and quiet quickly interrupted by not so stillness and quiet. All of a sudden your neighbors' loud conversation just became louder. And you find that you really don't care much about the animal they're fawning over. It doesn't help that you have to get up and move on to your second job that is already somewhat grating on your nerves. You go anyway and on the walk there you find that the smallest things are ready to set you off like a Pitbull on stupid.

Your imagination is an open maw snapping after violent scenario after violent scenario. But on the outside, you smile and wave. Nevermind school's endless march, the fact that August is still forever away, and your scale number hasn't even budged a pound in the downward direction.

Some may call this pent up "frustration." Heck, some of ya might even call it being in the iron grasp of PMS. Or some may call it having a bad day.

I call it totally throwing off my groove. *Cue the big guy that comes and tosses you out of an inconspicuous window* Wow, Kuzco has something there, I feel better all ready! I should toss people out of windows more often...

Mega Mini Muzingz

Movement Sensor Paper Towel Dispensers

You know what I'm talking about, right? Those paper towel dispensers that you have to wave your hand in front of for five to ten frickin' minutes before it even registers that you need a paper towel? And by the time you get done waving at the dang thing your hand is already dry and you've given yourself a little work out. So, just to be fair, you wash your hands again and give the other arm a go.

But those are the less stingy machines. I'm seriously beginning to wonder if manufactuers have implanted a tiny candid camera coupled with a sadistic humor into their dispensers. If these things could talk or think,I believe an encounter with victimus homo sapien would go something like this.

The camera that serves as an eyeball lazily comes into focus on the frustrated person waving it. I imagine there would be some sort of amused mechanical chuckle or maybe it's like those fancy GPS systems that have that sultry, seductive female voice. (WARNING TANGENT AHEAD) And what is with that? Do GPS dingbats believe that females don't drive? So, they just market to the male demographic? I object! If they have the audacity to insert the dulcet tones of a woman's voice into a GPS system I say they make a GPS geared toward the other half of the planet! I want a nice soothing voice with just a touch of an accent. But then that's opening a whole can of a different kind of adultery. Can you imagine? Husband and wife come in and admit, "Honey, I'm having an affair with my car." Uh, more than just slightly awkward and a good reason to not give machines creepy "come hither" voices.

Anyway, back to the paper towel dispenser of diabolical disposition. It's camera is fully focused and it's interest is definitely piqued by this bipedal creature waving at it frantically. Searching its small database it realizes, it should spit out a paper towel. But it'd been so long since it's had any entertainment...

"I'm sorry but this is a left handed functioning dispenser."

The woman gawks at if for a moment and then switches hands.

"But for right handed people the traditional Head, Shoulders,Knees and Toes is required."

She gives the dispenser a withering glare and makes sure no one else is in the bathroom. True to form, she delivers the dance.

"I'm sorry, a security code has been activated, please perform the Hokey Poky."

Incredulous, she almost challenges the stupidity of giving a paper towel dispenser a security code, but figures she's already done Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes so her dignity is in shreds anyway. She does the Hokey Poky and looks expectantly at the machine.

"...Could you do it to a hip hop remix?" It questions.

< Insert pregnant pause here as victimus homo-sapien processes she's been had >

Mt. Vesuvius belching would be less intimidating than the woman screaming at the dispenser on the wall. Security, at some point, came in and hauled her away. And the little paper towel dispenser went back into sleep mode, chuckling that some bipeds just didn't have a sense of humor.


Join us next time for The Haunting of the Kirkham!!!

Awesome Friday!

Chaska and I headed down to Utah Thursday night and we had a blast just talking. She dropped me off with Sarah Herrington and commenced the beginnings to a most amazing weekend. :D

Next morning Sarah and I met up with her old mission companion Jeannie and had breakfast at IHop. We went back to the Stratton's (amazing family). We picked up a sundae from McD's then headed to Paul Mitchell for our facials. Can I please say the most phenomenal 2 hours of pampering ever! And it was complimentary. :D

Then we headed to the church history museum on temple square. So much to see, I want to go back! Heck, if the traffic and various other things didn't bother me, I'd like to move to Utah. :D Wouldn't want my kids to grow up there though...

Anyway, after the museum, we headed for a Subway, and then made a mad dash for the airport to catch my shuttle.

It was sooo good to see Sarah. I missed her tons. We talked about the mission, what we've been up to, future plans and so on. I'm dead set on being a cosmetologist. I find it to be a rewarding line of work, not only for the client but for the cosmetologist as well.

Okay, it's Saturday and I gotta get going. YAY!!!

Of Art History, Genetically Mutated Ninjas, and Secular Entertainment...OH MY!

Does anyone else find it particularly disturbing that the only reason I have an inkling of a desire to actually study the Renaissance and High Renaissance art period is because; A.) I have an unhealthy infatuation with the 80's phenomenon that never died, The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and, B.) My fiance has a slightly more healthy infatuation with Dan Brown's The Da Vinci Code and Angels and Demons.

After re-reading that blasphemous paragraph masquerading as a run-on sentence, perhaps I should focus my efforts upon grammar. (shudder) Then again, maybe not...Where was I? Oh yes, Donatello, Leonardo, Raphael, and Michelangelo and why I do or don't wish to study their works. I suppose I could throw Bramante in there too seeing as how he actually designed St. Peter's Basilica and then handed it off to Michelangelo after he died, who then handed it off to someone else after he kicked the bucket to finish the dome.

So, I'm sitting in Art History and all I can picture is Ninja Turtles teamed up with Robert Langdon running amok on the streets of the Vatican City armed with paintbrushes and chisels...Periodically, the Turtles turn into their namesakes, who are just as confused as I am cuz frankly, I don't speak Italian. Robert Langdon is just wondering what happened to the turtles and why a bunch a dead Renaissance artists are up walking around. Okay, NOW, the turtles are back and Michelangelo wants to hit up every pizza place, Donatello is enamored with the history and scolds me that I should be doing the same. (I stick my tongue out at him.)Leonardo is trying to keep tabs on Mikey and Raphael is... being Raphael. Don't ask what happened to Langdon at this point. I think he got frustrated and left. And thank goodness class ended because I don't think my brain could handle all the universal cross overs.

TEH END!!!

Awesome Crazy Weekend!!

Yay! Memorie came to Rexburg and we pretty much had a blast. Monsters vs. Aliens, cooking and baking, harassing FHE brothers and just hanging out. Banana splits and Steak dinner I think should be mentioned because they were DANG awesome.

Highlight of the weekend! Mem's dad was baptized on Sunday!!!!!!! How freaking cool amazing is that? I LOVE THIS GOSPEL! It's all about family. :) It was sincerely the most wonderful thing ever.

Gotta run!

Life...

...has a way of sneaking up on you. Or, when you go looking for it, there's a tendancy for it to tap you on the shoulder from behind, give you a goofy grin and wave like a sheepish two year old.

I'm getting married. I never EVER thought that I would typ or write those words unless there was a NOT in front of it. And yet, August 22nd is probably going to be the happiest day of my life. I say probably because I hear becoming a parent is a whole new level of happy. So, when I get preggers, I let you know which moment was the happiest, the getting to spend eternity with an amazing man or the beginings and additions to an eternal family.

God seems to be opening His blessing basket once more for me. I get to see my awesome ex-roommate/sister by association/adoption, Memorie Allen!!! In addition to this, I get to see my very last companion in the mission, Sarah Herrington, next weekend. I haven't seen her in forever and we have a lot to catch up on.

I've just been amazed at how blessed I am with the people in my life; Family, Future in-laws, roommates, friends, and even the people I have the opportunity to work with.

I have a lot to be grateful for.

Looking for Balance

It's amazing how much there is I want to say, and yet, the words aren't coming. Or maybe it's because my thoughts are so many faceted that there's no real common ground.

My brain has been split to encompass the guy in my life, my friends, school, church, work (or lack there of) and family. My time isn't my own, and I don't know if it ever will be again. That concept right there is hard for me to swallow. I don't mind sharing my time with others, its when I have to decide which equally important things get my time, and which one doesn't. It kills me!

For example, a friend is having a rough day and needs comfort and has given it to me in the past. There is also homework that needs to be done on a consistent basis because of my major. I'm also supposed to be nurturing a relationship. Then there are callings to fulfill, classes to attend and be prepared for, and a job. Chores and other things necessary for survival in the proximity of other people.

I know the answer is a schedule and sticking to it, as well as balance. But let me tell ya, finding balance is just as difficult as maintaining it!